hey butts, i'm back from Kiwiburn!

now that i have some images to share, i'll start posting about my experiences: first my personal reflections, then what happened in the next chapter of Desmond.

personal reflections

i had a really nice time, lots of snugs and dancing and yum.

what i'm leaving behind:

i want to leave behind how i compare myself to others. i often see the expressions and hear the experiences of others and think: "i should be like that". there were many moments where i was given opportunities that i opted out of (feeling uncomfortable with stealing back Desmond, feeling like i wanted to leave parties early to be in my tent), which initially gave me feelings that i missing out for staying within my comfort zone and not pushing myself enough to be vulnerable. later i realized that my intuition is worth listening to (we had a procession, said prayers in a ceremony, and gave a gift offering to the camp who stole Desmond), even if it feels like i'm taking the easy path, i'd rather be me than be someone else. i want to not worry about taking a wrong step in a dance, that communication with sloppy conversation is better than no communication.

what i'm taking away:

i want to take away an appreciation for my energy. i noticed that i'm strong, stable, slow, and quiet, like the roots of a tree. i have a large energetic body and love to express myself in my own way (i like to dance and snug), i'm not very good at thinking on my feet in an unknown situation, i'm easily overwhelmed, i prefer to step back and have time to think, my emotions are steady and don't oscillate from very highs to very slows, i'm not very ecstatic and instead am more calm and focused. i want to learn more about how i give and receive energy so i can harmonize my notes better with others, so i can better understand how to amplify, accentuate, and attenuate my power.

what support i want:

i want others to support me by being a mirror for me to see myself. i initially learned this from my co-worker @Juliet: that the best a friend can provide you is an accurate reflection of yourself, so you can see how you really are, good and bad. i want direct feedback on when others feel i'm being true to my authentic self and when others feel i'm trying to be someone that isn't really me.

anyways, that's enough about me!